back again

Even though I am disgustingly tired, I have some thoughts twisting in my head, and since I don't have any paper, I decided to inscribe them on this long not-active blog. In fact, I do feel a bit disgusting because I don't have any soap. Correction: the soap is in my bag, and I'm too tired to get it out. How's that for laziness? I already dread being here... My room is pretty shabby, but one can't concentrate on that too long if one knows that they have to live there for the whole year. I am not happy with my neighbors, but hopefully they will party elsewhere. We have these little introductory pages on our doors...mine says "look, it's the grim recycler" or maybe just "the grim recycler." very accurate, actually. but it still makes me a modicum sad/angry/upset that my housemates see me that way.

i don't like living, and dealing with so many people that i don't really like in such close proximity. meeting the wonderful people in ecuador has taught me that there are people that i'm compatible with, and i don't need to step down to look for friends. by step down, i mean my friendship/people standards, not off of any other platform. i also generally can't wait to get out of here...

recently though, i realized that most of this university business is complete and utter bollocks. yeah, i'm here to get a degree, and to have fun in chicago. i'm not here to put myself in some psychiatric division of the nearby ward, or to pull out all of my hair. i really need to try to keep some perspective on the situation. most of it really is meaningless. trivial, minute details. there are so many things in my life that are myriad times important to me than this university. and i'm not breaking my neck for it.

there. i'm going to bed. (already in bed. i mean, sleep.)